Gents Weekly: GRIT

Issue #20: The manliest newsletter on the internet • May 25, 2026

Jun 01, 2026

Welcome to issue #20 of The Gents Weekly, a newsletter for the modern man.

Every Monday, you’ll receive a weekly roundup of inspiring ideas + products to help you become a better man.

Brought to you by the men of Gents Journey — Dean Bokhari, Stephen Seidel, and Matt McManus.

📝 THE MESSAGE

A timely piece from the gents.
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Gettin gritty with it

A man with grit is a man that possesses an indomitable spirit.

He shows courage, mental toughness, and refuses to give up.

In psychology, grit is defined as a powerful combination of passion and perseverance toward long-term goals

So, here’s the big question:

How do you develop grit as a man?

Allow me to break it down for you, my fellow gent.

By the time you’ve finished this first column of the Gents Weekly, you’ll know how to build prime Hugh-Jackman-as-Wolverine-level grit.

Let’s get into it.

In her book, Grit, author Angela Duckworth writes,

“in the simplest terms, this means that some of the variation in grit in the population can be attributed to genetic factors, and the rest can be attributed to experience.”

You may have inherited a touch of grit from mom and dad, or both.

But for the most part, according to researchers, any grit you might be blessed with is negligible in comparison to:

the experiences you have,
the failures you experience,
and the people around you.

But your grit also changes over time – as you grow and adapt to challenges.

It’s also constantly impacted by the culture you’re surrounded by.

There are four traits that gritty men have in common:

Interest — Gritty men have an interest and a passion in what they do.
Practice — Their deep interest leads to deep practice; the daily discipline of doing things better than we did yesterday.
Purpose — A belief in the meaning of the work.
Hope — The last trait is hope, the optimistic belief in engaging in every stage regardless of setbacks. You can grow your grit from the inside out.

Here’s how to translate these traits into something you can apply in your day to day life:

INTEREST + PASSION

Spend more time doing things you’re interested in and passionate about. If you can swing it, it’s ideal to spend most of your time doing something you’re deeply interested in. But if that’s not the case for you—if you think your life is boring and uninteresting; if you don’t have anything you’re passionate about, let me let you in on a little secret: passion isn’t found, it’s cultivated. You don’t wake up one day and fucking stumble upon your passion. You’ve got to bring it with you. Passion is a state of mind. And you can infuse everything you do with it.

PRACTICE + DISCIPLINE

Whatever you spend most of your time doing, bring depth to it. Develop the discipline to get a little bit better each day… As a father and husband. As a son or student. At work and at home.

PURPOSE + MEANING

Become a more purposeful man. I decided a long time ago not to do anything that doesn’t align with my purpose, which is: to inspire and empower as many people as I possibly can to achieve their goals and improve their lives. That’s my purpose, my WHY, or whatever else you want to call it. Your purpose is something that lights you up — it’s the mission or a cause you care about most. It’s something you find especially meaningful. If you aren’t clear about yours, clarify it now.

HOPE + OPTIMISM

Lastly, grit requires optimism. If you’re not hopeful about your future, it’ll be hard to move through life—especially as a man. And guess what? Becoming hopeful and optimistic is a choice. Plain and simple. If you want to become a happier, healthier, more optimistic man, then CHOOSE to be. Right here. Right now. Today, tomorrow, and always.

Stay gritty gents,

— Dean Bokhari
Co-founder, Gents Journey

Share this with a friend who could use it.

📰 THE MOMENT

Sh*t that’s happening now, ICYMI
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This Week’s AI Prompt: GRIT

Talent gets you started. GRIT gets you finished.

Everyone starts with big dreams and motivation. The gym on January 1st. The business idea on Sunday night. The project you swore you’d finish this time.

But motivation fades. Talent hits a ceiling. Life gets hard.

And that’s when most people quit.

GRIT is what separates the ones who finish from the ones who just talk about it.

This prompt helps you figure out where you’re quitting when things get hard—and how to build the grit to push through anyway.

THE PROMPT:

Copy everything below and paste it into ChatGPT or Claude:

I want to build real GRIT—not just motivation, but the ability to keep going when it gets hard, boring, or painful. Help me figure out where I'm quitting and how to push through.

Help me:

1. Identify where I quit when things get hard
   - What have I started but never finished?
   - What goal have I set multiple times but never followed through on?
   - Where do I give up when it stops being fun or easy?
   - What's the pattern? (Do I quit when I hit a plateau? When I'm tired? When no one's watching?)

2. Figure out what I need GRIT for right now
   - What's the ONE thing I'm working on that I keep wanting to quit?
   - Why does it matter? What happens if I quit? What happens if I finish?
   - What's hard about it right now? (Be specific—not "it's hard," but what exactly is making me want to quit?)

3. Understand the difference between motivation and GRIT
   - When am I relying on motivation (which fades) vs. systems (which don't)?
   - What do I do on the days when I don't feel like doing it?
   - How do I show up when no one's watching, no one's cheering, and no one cares?

4. Build a GRIT system (How to keep going when I want to quit)
   - What's my daily non-negotiable? (The ONE thing I do every day no matter what)
   - What's my "minimum viable effort" on bad days? (What's the smallest version of showing up?)
   - How do I track progress so I can see I'm moving forward even when it feels slow?
   - Who's my accountability partner? (Someone who won't let me quit)
   - What's my reminder for WHY I'm doing this when it gets hard?

5. Prepare for the moments I want to quit
   - What excuses do I make when I want to quit? (Write them down now)
   - What's my response to each excuse? (Pre-decide so I don't rationalize quitting)
   - What do I tell myself on the days I don't want to show up?
   - What's my "fuck it, let's go" moment when quitting feels easier?

Here's what I'm working on right now: [Describe the goal/project/habit]

Here's where I keep quitting: [Be honest about the pattern]

Here's why it matters: [Why can't I quit this time?]

Don't let me make excuses. Build me a system to keep going when talent quits.

WHAT HAPPENS NEXT

The AI is going to force you to face where you quit and why. It’s going to help you build a system so you show up even when you don’t feel like it.

By the end, you’ll have:

A clear picture of where you quit and why
A system to keep going when motivation fades
A daily non-negotiable action
Pre-written responses to your own excuses
Accountability built in

WHY THIS MATTERS

Talent gets you started. GRIT gets you finished.

Most guys have talent. Most guys have good ideas. Most guys start strong.

But when it gets hard, boring, or painful? When no one’s watching? When the progress slows down?

That’s when talent quits. And GRIT takes over.

The question isn’t whether you’re talented. It’s whether you have the grit to finish what you started.

Drop one thing you’re committing to finishing no matter what. Let’s see who has the grit to follow through.

— Matt McManus
Co-founder, Gents Journey
GRIT: When Talent Quits

👊 THE MOVES

Media for men.
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Watch | Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance

In the TED Talk above, psychologist Angela Duckworth shares a powerful insight: success is not determined by talent or IQ alone — it’s driven by GRIT.

The people who succeed are often the ones who keep showing up.

The cadet who doesn’t quit.
The student who keeps studying.
The entrepreneur who keeps building after rejection.

GRIT is passion and perseverance for long-term goals. It’s the ability to keep moving forward when things get hard, uncomfortable, or uncertain.

Because life isn’t a sprint. It’s a marathon. Like Nemo said, “Just keep swimming.”

Survival Mode vs. Intentional Living

When I was laid off from my first job at Motorola as an engineer, I made a decision that confused a lot of people: I pursued acting.

For more than 10 years, I struggled.

I eventually made it to Los Angeles with around $100 in my bank account, living in a 300-square-foot half-studio apartment where rent was my biggest nemesis. I worked odd jobs. Auditioned constantly and heard “no” more times than I could count.

But I refused to stop. As Angela shared above, I just kept showing up.

I had goals I wanted to achieve, and I literally wrote them on my walls.

Because I believed if I wrote them down and worked toward them relentlessly, God, the universe, or whatever force you believe in would begin conspiring to help make them happen.

And slowly, one by one, they did.

This past year, 15 years later, I checked off the final goal on that wall and sold a TV show based on my true crime podcast, Wolves Among Us — the story of a drug-dealing dentist from Philadelphia — starring Colin Jost.

That dream once lived on a wall, and I never stopped pursuing it because I learned to see every rejection not as a “no,” but simply as a “not yet.”

Here’s a question from our Journey Deck for you to comment on:
What has failure taught you?

The Power of GRIT: Gratitude, Resilience, Integrity & Trust

Hopefully, you’ve realized by now that failure doesn’t really exist. It’s just another step toward building your future and strengthening your story.

That’s why I like to think of GRIT as:

Gratitude
Resilience
Integrity
Trust

When you move through life with GRIT — trusting that everything happens for a reason — you eventually land exactly where you’re supposed to be.

I bet you’ve had GRIT recently, too.

Maybe in your marriage.
At work.
Through heartbreak.
Through loss.
Through rebuilding your life when you didn’t think you could.

But you kept going.

And that matters.

Drop a comment below about a moment where you didn’t think you’d make it through — but did anyway through GRIT and determination.

Gritty Philadelphia Flyers Mascot Standee

And I’ll leave you with this: as a Philly guy, we’re known for being underdogs with perseverance. So maybe it’s no coincidence our wild and steadfast Flyers mascot is named Gritty.

— Stephen Seidel
Co-founder, Gents Journey