Gents Weekly: The Fastest Way to Change Anything
Issue #18: The manliest newsletter on the internet • May 11, 2026
Welcome to issue #18 of The Gents Weekly, a newsletter for the modern man.
Every Monday, you’ll receive a weekly roundup of inspiring ideas + products to help you become a better man.
Brought to you by the men of Gents Journey — Dean Bokhari, Stephen Seidel, and Matt McManus.
📝 THE MESSAGE
A timely piece from the gents.
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How to create lasting change in life
I took off my shirt and stood in front of the mirror. At 19 years old, I was overweight and out of shape. I was sick of being chubby and soft. I was sick of feeling tired all the time. I was sick of having no confidence.
Truth be told, my whole life was a mess.
And I was sick of it.
I was sick of what I’d let myself become.
The worst part? I had done this to myself.
I, and I alone, was responsible for what I’d let myself become.
I had no one to blame but myself.
As I stood there in front of my mirror and looked at my soft, pudgy body, I felt disgusted with myself. I had man-boobs… man-boobs!
It was a painful feeling.
But something happened for me in that moment, something shifted…
I looked at myself and said out loud, “Enough is ENOUGH! It’s time to change!”
All my emotions welled-up inside me, and I kept yelling, “Enough is enough!”
I was ready to take on the challenge of changing my physical state.
That night, I decided to change.
I knew it would be hard. I knew it would be painful.
But in that moment, I also knew that I could do it.
And eventually, I did.
17 years later, I still remember that moment, because it taught me that I was capable of doing anything—but it was up to me.
Now, whenever I’m faced with challenges, trials and tribulations, rather than complaining about them or allowing the victim-mentality to take hold, I choose to believe this challenge is here to help me become better.
I choose to believe there’s a better version of me on the other side of every challenge I’m forced to deal with.
And once I decide to use my problem as an opportunity to learn what I’m made of—rather than an opportunity to complain and wallow in my own misery—a powerful, two-part shift occurs:
1: The first part of this shift is mental: on the other side of this problem, there’s a better version of me. This first mental shift then leads to shift number two…
2: The second part of this shift is physical, which says: ‘Now that I know this problem/pain/challenge is an opportunity to grow, what are the ACTIONS I need to take to make that growth happen?’
It takes the same amount of energy to stress yourself out thinking about your problems as it does to make a definite decision to DO something about them…
Deciding to fix your problems will move you towards an eventual solution—if you take action.
But thinking about why you don’t have what you want, or wondering why bad things “always” happen to you, will get you nowhere but backward.
Problems are a good thing.
Solving them makes you happy.
Now, here’s the exact 4-step formula for creating lasting changes in any area of your life…
